HOLISTIC LOVE YOGA

My mood took a steep nose dive recently and it was intense.  Found myself shuffling round my flat head down, heart sinking unable to find appreciation for anything. Despite the gorgeous sunshine outside, a dark cloud was gathering over me threatening to burst all over my floor. Lockdown isn’t a breeze for any of us and just like ‘normal’ life we’re all experiencing it differently - each with our own challenges. Being in solo lock-down can cause extreme feelings of loneliness and a distinct yearning for human touch, yet on the opposite end of the spectrum there are probably people losing their sanity in a tiny space with a moody unsupportive partner.  These are just two examples of the infinite human experiences happening all over the globe right now. It is testing us to our max socially, politically, emotionally, economically on and on in every way, individually and collectively. What a time to be alive eh?  So it’s never been more important to look after, nur...

Where I grew up there wasn’t a language for self care and definitely not for self-love. In fact, it was really important you didn’t love yourself, if you did you better not show it or someone’d push you over in those ridiculous boots you’d gotten too big for. Being accused of loving yourself was a legitimate insult, it was hurled anytime you showed too much confidence, were too happy or too free in your self expression. The threat of being tarnished as a self lover loomed like an aggressive dinner lady, ever ready to catch you doing something you shouldn’t be and hauling you off never to be seen again. It meant many of us grew into young adults who didn't know what it meant to even like ourselves, let alone love ourselves – the concept was as foreign as moon rock. It created generations of us with low self worth, low self esteem, and no idea what it is to honour ourselves. But things are changing, as Ru Paul so honestly asks – ‘ “ honey,  if you don't  love yours...

Hi friend, how you feelin? Did you dress yet? Have a glass of wine before midday? How dirty is your hair? Wherever this finds you, you’re doing great. Trust me. I will never lie - this week hit me like a ton of bricks on top of a steam train on top of a sperm whale. Dramatic? Not really. I hadn’t understood the process of settling into something like this, does anyone? Where’s the guide book for it…? Oh we’ve got to write it…hmmm. There was much talk ‘in the beginning’ of business as usual, we cracked open our laptops on the kitchen table and fired off emails, became a flurry of creative activity which exploded on to all of our newsfeeds, driving even more creativity and productivity, a collective sense of ‘keeping calm and keeping up.' Me too, I flew around with the crazed energy of one about to be locked away thinking I shall use this time to sharpen my skills, get myself out there (virtually of course…), read, write, sing, dance, learn to cook, play the uke, speak Fr...

Hey there, how you doin’ now you live inside a full on science fiction movie? One that nobody would ever actually write because it’s just too implausible? You Ok? Deep breaths, it is going to be just fine…somehow. There has never been a time to be more grateful for our health, our lives, our friends, our support system, whether that be your home, your breath, the ground beneath you. What a time to embrace the present moment, openness, flexibility, trust, awareness, gratitude, relaxation etc etc etc. The list is inexhaustible. I won’t lie, there have been nights where I’ve stupidly checked the news just before trying to sleep and consequently been sat upright in bed dancing round the edges of a panic attack. Anxiety like I haven’t felt in 8 years, tight chest, nausea, deep deep worry and fear. All I could possibly do was pull my knees into my chest, rock myself side to side, take long slow smooth breaths and mentally tell myself I was safe, that this will pass. This is...

Without a doubt the single best thing I’m learning to do for myself is accept who the hell I am. This is (and probs always will be) a Work. In. Progress. Even releasing this blog inconsistently with large gaps in between fills me with a mild but omniscient anxiety with whispers of inadequacy and laziness, comparisons to everyone else in the world who can trot out countless posts and look fabulous while they’re doing it. Meanwhile I’m moving house, accumulating pinchy shoulders and hips from neglecting my practice (because 'Life') and writing half a post a month. And you know what...? It's all good. No one cares babes. I know this isn't exactly News but always worth reminding ourselves that tons of us underwent a major conditioning process that taught us that we must become a commercial success to be worthy of rest, peace and love, and because of this we often withhold from ourselves exactly what we are searching for in the first place. That which can onl...

I’m into self empowerment, are you? What choice do we have? Victimhood? Languishing in fear waiting for some saviour to come and pull us out of the shit? I got news for you babes, no one’s coming. But guess what, you got you. You are responsible for you. For the food you eat, for the thoughts you think, for the choices you make. I grew up seeing dis-empowerment everywhere. Thoroughly working class, I was born into Thatcher’s government at a time when a man could still legally rape his wife; oppression was woven into my childhood. The disdain our current prime minister has openly displayed towards people like myself and family of origin was real – I felt it. The absence of self worth and self esteem, the disbelief that we deserved more from Life and  could be more in Life hung around, blanketing my childhood like a stinking smog. After all, aren’t we but the sons and daughters of men ‘likely to be drunk, criminal, aimless, feckless and hopeless?’ (Boris Johnson, 1995). ...